Thursday, December 8, 2011

Watching the News...

This whole process of international adoption has been an eye-opener in so many unexpected ways.  For example: watching the news has all new meaning.

I've always been an international-type.  Having lived abroad for so much of my life, I like to think of myself as someone who is at least moderately aware of things outside the good ole US of A.  I look forward to November every year to see the Oxi Day coverage of Greece, and I perk up when Germany is in the news, too.

Never before, however, has news coverage of far-away places struck fear into my heart.  (OK, that's not true, either.  I am perfectly willing to admit that while my brother was deployed in Afghanistan I pretty much changed the channel whenever there was a scrubby desert on my TV screen).

But I digress...

Things are happening in Max's home country.  Almost none of it has anything to do with adoption (though there have been some VERY recent law changes about that,too that make me twitchy and anxious).  However, watching the tension between our country and his at the moment has both of us biting our lips.  It's probably irrational.  It seems unlikely that Events on a Global Scale could really affect our little family.

But stranger things have happened.

What it really comes down to, I think is what I am beginning to think of as post-infertility-syndrome.  This syndrome presents itself in only one way so far, but it's a doozy.  I call it "waiting-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop-itis."  On some level I realize that sometimes you make it through different aspects of your life without all the shoe-dropping, but I think Jason and I have become conditioned to it (in rather than same way that you train a dog to an electric fence...).

I know it's a little irrational.  I know it.

And I also know that I won't stop fretting and losing sleep until Max walks through Customs and Immigration on this side of the pond...

1 comment:

  1. Cat,

    Just catching up on some blog reading. Wanted to let you know I have the same syndrome! : ) diagnosis... waiting for the other shoe to drop!! You are so not alone.

    I also agree that when you have had these types of experiences over and over again, especially when it comes to becoming parents, its hard not too! I agree with you and when we are on our planes home, with our sons with us, we will do something we probably truly haven't done since we began this process and that's...breathe! : )